A couple of weeks ago I decided to shave my 'bits'. I've done it before and I enjoyed the feeling of a newly shorn nether region. Everytime I do this though, I always end up with an ingrown hair. And if you've never had one, let me just tell you that it never ends up lookin' pretty. So I got this goin on.
And on Saturday I discovered that I had an extremely itchy toe. I took off my sock and noted the tell-tale sign of athlete's foot. Which is ironic because I'm not much of an athlete. So I picked up some Tenactin and have been using that but it takes 4 weeks to cure. So I guess my foot will remain athletic for awhile yet.
Then on Sunday morning, I awoke with the worst toothache ever. Top tooth at the back. It felt like someone were fucking my brain while wearing a barbed wire condom. The only way to alleviate the pain (dentists are closed on Sundays. Assholes), was to swish extremely cold water around my mouth which would numb the pain for all of 45 seconds. The toothache lasted from 8am Sunday morning until 6:30am Monday morning. Seeing how I couldn't sleep, I spent that 22 1/2 hours drinking extremely cold water. I peed alot and took yesterday off.
So, that's how my weekend was. Christ, I'm attractive.
Ouch,
Mr. Winkie
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3 comments:
ouch...
hope you get that sorted out
I'm falling apart! I feel like I should move to a leper colony and hang out with other 'unclean' people.
barbed wire condom... i bet thats marketable to masochists.
*coughs* im sick.
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