Before I get started, this is the first time in my life I ever quoted Foreigner without following it with a string of expletives. But it made for an a'papros title for todays entry.
I'll be celebrating/cursing my 39th birthday in a couple of weeks and I realized that the love you feel for someone when your 17 or 18 is different then the love you feel for someone when you not 17 or 18.
Things a young girl would say and an old man would say are different.
17yr. old: I can't live without him!
39yr. old: I can't live without her company medical plan.
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17yr. old: Just looking at him makes me melt!
39yr. old: Last night we fucked and she got on top. Call Guiness!
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17yr. old: He showers me with love.
39yr. old: I'm going to jerk off in the shower.
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17yr. old: I can so see us growing old together.
39yr. old: If you were my friend you'd kill me.
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17yr. old: We made love last night!
39yr. old: We made macaroni and cheese last night.
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17yr. old: When we're together nothing else matters.
39 yr. old: When I pick her up from work I go up to the receptionist and drop my pen. When I bend over to pick it up, I can see up her skirt! Mmmmm.
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17yr. old: He's soooo funny!
39yr. old: She's sooooooo retarded.
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Sincerely,
Mr. Winkie
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Monday, March 12, 2007
I don't know why I swallowed the fly.
I'm not an old lady but I swallowed a fly. I don't think I'll die but it wasn't very pleasant. And I don't care what anyone tells you, flies do NOT taste like chicken. They taste more like Cheese Puffs chased with Diet Coke. Now Spittlebugs - there's a meal! Whether they're in the larval stage or full grown, Spittlebugs make my mouth water!
Spittlebug Pie Recipe
100 - Spittle Bugs
1 - Pie shell and crust
Cinnamon
Combine Cinnamon and spittlebugs then put it in the pie shell and then bake it. Eat it when it's done.
The best thing about Spittlebugs is that their name has the word "spittle" in it. It's a fun word!
I don't know where I'm going with this but something tells me that it's nowhere.
Love,
Mr. Winkie
Spittlebug Pie Recipe
100 - Spittle Bugs
1 - Pie shell and crust
Cinnamon
Combine Cinnamon and spittlebugs then put it in the pie shell and then bake it. Eat it when it's done.
The best thing about Spittlebugs is that their name has the word "spittle" in it. It's a fun word!
I don't know where I'm going with this but something tells me that it's nowhere.
Love,
Mr. Winkie
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